Why do a thing? Or Not?

Why? Not? Why do it?

Seriously. Why do it? Why invest the time? Or why do you not invest the time? Why “waste the time?” Why do you return to a habit that you regret or detest? And what keeps you doing it?

All interesting. Very interesting indeed.

After all why am I reading this? Why am I writing this? What motivates me to do something different or follow the same path? And which is better?

And now that I have all these thoughts of motivation written out, what now do I do? And again, why? Or why not?

Motivation. What motivates me to do that which I do? And what motivates me to do what I think is good versus bad? What is good for me? What’s the “point?”

Me? I find that I am motivated much by the impact or rather potential impact on the world I live in. The ecosystem I’m in. My family. My children. My wife. My own time. My own health. My friends. My community I live in. The things that I care most about and why do I care about them?

Discerning what I should do and when? And why should I at all and how it will potentially impact these things.

I say potential impact because much of what motivates me is avoiding negatives. Take my health for example. I diet to avoid the possibility of putting back on those 50lb’s that I lost. I diet because I didn’t like the way I looked or felt with those extra 50lbs. The potential impact of that weight gain is what keeps me from indulging in a diet of chocolate bars and cheesecake everyday of the week. Disciplining myself on my diet has helped me potentially impact my health in what I hope is potentially a positive impact. I stay disciplined because I don’t want the negative impact. I don’t know for certain if I’d be healthier at one weight or the other, but I believe in the potential that the lower weight is better.

So probably a bit like you, I have to make choices every day on how I spend my time. And what I find personally most fascinating is the impact that previous decisions I have made have on how I spend my time today. And what will be the impact tomorrow based on what I spend my time on today? Is it a pattern? Since I started something, do I continue on?

Is it debt? Is it obligation? Is it that a path was started and now it must be finished? But why? Why finish at all?

Is it financial gain? Is it a desire for recognition? Do I feel better about myself? Do I make someone I care about feel better?

The more I think about this, the more I realize there isn’t necessarily a quick answer, at least for me. And in more things than I care to admit there may not be a clear answer.

More importantly, if I start doing something, should I stop? For my best interest or for the best interest of the person I would rather I turned out to be? Maybe it’s not the “me” of today? Maybe it’s the “me” of the future?

Well, this much is certain. Time spent by “me” cannot be gained back. Once spent it is gone. That minute is past, and this minute is over. Yet another minute and another investment spent on something.

It’s early in the morning as I write this. And why I am writing this is because I have been thinking a lot about why do I do what I do? And whether or not I want to keep doing certain things? And why ask the question at all? I have a big deadline at work. It makes me ask the question, “why?”

Again?

So much of what motivates me to do things I need to do is my wife and kids. There are fiscal motives. Things I do because of the need to pay for things with money. And then there is the personal desires. The things that are in my heart and soul and I cannot escape.

How connected am I? Between the time I spend and where my desires and motivations are? How lined up am I? Am I on track in this path?

And concerning those that I love, am I the best example and teacher for them? Am I the best friend for them? Am I the best son? Brother? Do I care if I am or not? And how do I pick and choose? I can’t do every thing or execute on every idea, so now what?

I have to think about this some more.

Do you find yourself saying, “I shouldn’t do this?” Or “I should do that?”

Why? And how will you decide whether you will follow through?

If I suddenly become self aware of something I am doing or about to do, and if I cannot clearly determine why I am doing it, maybe I shouldn’t do it anymore? Maybe it’s time to pick something else to do that helps me become the person I’d rather be? And if I don’t know who that is? Maybe I should invest the time in thinking about that so I can make some better decisions?

Then again, maybe there is nothing wrong with not having such a plan or a desire. Having no plan could be the plan that is right for you? Or me? Maybe I have no more plans?

Perhaps the question “why do something” boils down to another question of “what do I care about and why”; then “what am I prepared to do about what I care about”? Or “am I okay with doing nothing”?

As for me? Years ago I put on the headline of my blog “I do what I do because I believe I should do it…” So what “should” I do?